I talked to my new fantastic nurse, Emily, this afternoon around 4:00 pm. She said that Murtle looks great. Dr. Sacks saw it for himself this afternoon and was pleased. She didn't have any other stats for me, but said that the embryologist will provide more information than I cared to know about it tomorrow. Ha! I don't think I would ever think there is too much information when it comes to this infertility stuff. Anyway, my ET is at 7:15 tomorrow morning. We're supposed to be there at 6:45. I guess all of these early morning appointments are just preparing me for motherhood.
I still am in a bit of shock that this first IVF has continued to progress. Yesterday, I was prepared for Emily to tell me that Murtle didn't fertilize. Today I was prepared for Emily to tell me that she stopped growing. However, in the back of my head, I have been feeling pretty optimistic. This just feels like the right time to be a mother. While I don't know if that feeling is right or not, in the meantime I will just try to go with the flow and enjoy the ride as it unfolds.
Go Murtle go!
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
On My Way to IOTO?!
Murtle fertilized!! DH and I can create an embryo! Obviously, I'm feeling realistic that there are still a lot of obstacles ahead, but for some reason, hearing about my egg's first fertilization seems like such an incredible and miraculous milestone. DH and I have created a new living being together - I'm still in awe of the significance and meaning of that.
We actually have a chance at being an It Only Takes One (IOTO) success story! DH feels much more optimistic about our chances that I'll actually get pregnant now than I do because he thinks the hard part is over. In fact, he felt pretty confident that we'd achieve fertilization because "we took all of the challenges out of creating an embryo (because of the ER and ICSI), so of course it was going to work." Men can be so naive, but we love them unconditionally anyway!
We actually have a chance at being an It Only Takes One (IOTO) success story! DH feels much more optimistic about our chances that I'll actually get pregnant now than I do because he thinks the hard part is over. In fact, he felt pretty confident that we'd achieve fertilization because "we took all of the challenges out of creating an embryo (because of the ER and ICSI), so of course it was going to work." Men can be so naive, but we love them unconditionally anyway!
Monday, September 28, 2009
It Only Takes One!
The actual egg retrieval procedure and recovery went really well this morning. Dr. Sacks and the nurses were great and took very good care of me and my husband. This was only the second time in my life that I've ever been put under. Let me tell you - the anesthesiologist (Dr. Ko) mixed a great "cocktail" (not to mention she was warm and wonderful)! Unfortunately, Dr. Sacks was able to retrieve one only egg, despite having those four follicles. He went to synagogue (for Yom Kippur no less, yet he still was there for me) after my procedure, but stopped by my recovery room beforehand to give us the update and then said that he was going to go and pray for our little guy. It's so nice to feel so well cared for!
So, while it wasn't the outcome for which we had hoped, I'm adopting the attitude that it only takes one. I already feel a sense of attachment to my little egg that is hopefully becoming our little embryo as I type this and am praying for our little miracle. Oh, and my friends have dubbed my little egg / hopefully soon to be embaby, "Murtle," as in Murtle the Turtle! :D
As an aside, I did a bit of research to figure out why only one egg was retrieved. One logical explanation seems to be that those other eggs may have been attached too tightly to the follicular wall. More tightly attached eggs could be indicative of abnormal eggs that wouldn't have produced a healthy embryo. So, instead of giving me false hope that I had four eggs that could make it, instead, I have a realistic optimism that the one egg that was retrieved was a healthy one - and one that will become our baby.
Fertilization report to come tomorrow!
So, while it wasn't the outcome for which we had hoped, I'm adopting the attitude that it only takes one. I already feel a sense of attachment to my little egg that is hopefully becoming our little embryo as I type this and am praying for our little miracle. Oh, and my friends have dubbed my little egg / hopefully soon to be embaby, "Murtle," as in Murtle the Turtle! :D
As an aside, I did a bit of research to figure out why only one egg was retrieved. One logical explanation seems to be that those other eggs may have been attached too tightly to the follicular wall. More tightly attached eggs could be indicative of abnormal eggs that wouldn't have produced a healthy embryo. So, instead of giving me false hope that I had four eggs that could make it, instead, I have a realistic optimism that the one egg that was retrieved was a healthy one - and one that will become our baby.
Fertilization report to come tomorrow!
Sunday, September 27, 2009
Finally Time for Egg Retrieval
I triggered last night and my ER is set for tomorrow morning at 8:00 am! Surprisingly, the trigger shot was a breeze - the shot itself seemed to be even less painful than the sub-cutaneous shots, if that's possible. However today, my butt is reminding me that I got it last night.
Anyway, yesterday's check-up showed four follies on my left (20, 17, 17, and 13) and a 10 on my right. My E2 was 756 and lining was 11. I had to return this morning just for bloodwork to make sure that the trigger worked, which it did. So, I was instructed to not eat or drink anything after midnight tonight and I need to be at my RE's office at 7:15 tomorrow morning.
DH and I went to a nature preserve yesterday to check out some wildlife. We had to check-in at the front office to get a permit. Guess what was in the office? An aquarium w/ just two female TURTLES!!! And then as I was driving to my RE's office this morning for my bloodwork appointment guess what I saw - a turtle crossing the ramp to a major highway! All of these turtles have got to be someone telling me something.
Anyway, yesterday's check-up showed four follies on my left (20, 17, 17, and 13) and a 10 on my right. My E2 was 756 and lining was 11. I had to return this morning just for bloodwork to make sure that the trigger worked, which it did. So, I was instructed to not eat or drink anything after midnight tonight and I need to be at my RE's office at 7:15 tomorrow morning.
DH and I went to a nature preserve yesterday to check out some wildlife. We had to check-in at the front office to get a permit. Guess what was in the office? An aquarium w/ just two female TURTLES!!! And then as I was driving to my RE's office this morning for my bloodwork appointment guess what I saw - a turtle crossing the ramp to a major highway! All of these turtles have got to be someone telling me something.
Friday, September 25, 2009
Come on Turtles!
I had another check-up today. My follies on my right are now 16, 15, and 13 (and one lonely one on the left that's less than 10). I suppose that means that the Ganirelix stopped the 16 from Wednesday from getting any bigger, but the 14 has grown to a 15 and former unmeasurable one is now a 13. Dr. Sacks gave me the impression that he won't go to egg retrieval unless he can get all three of them. Depending on my bloodwork, he's hoping I can stim tonight and tomorrow, trigger on Sunday and then (fingers crossed) have egg retrieval on Tuesday. Now I will obsess on finding out what the chances are that those three follies will keep growing and make it to egg retrieval.
A little side note - my co-worker loves turtles, too, and she has two beautiful glass ones on her desk. I've been filling her in on things, so she loaned me the turtles while I'm going through this. Well, today I joked and asked if she had any more and she said, "actually, I do!" And she gave me two smaller ones - it's funny because they resemble the sizes of my follies - one big one, two smaller ones and a fourth one that resembles a tiny baby like the unmeasurable one on my left side!
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Bloodwork results are in: E2 - 692; LH - 6.5; P4 - 0.7; Lining - 10.
A little side note - my co-worker loves turtles, too, and she has two beautiful glass ones on her desk. I've been filling her in on things, so she loaned me the turtles while I'm going through this. Well, today I joked and asked if she had any more and she said, "actually, I do!" And she gave me two smaller ones - it's funny because they resemble the sizes of my follies - one big one, two smaller ones and a fourth one that resembles a tiny baby like the unmeasurable one on my left side!
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Bloodwork results are in: E2 - 692; LH - 6.5; P4 - 0.7; Lining - 10.
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Maybe I really am old...
Making it to your first IVF can be so exciting - I was so hopeful that my body would prove my high FSH and low antral follicle count wrong by producing as many eggs as a 20-year old can. Sometimes I feel like I'm 20 - I'm strong, healthy, and happy and feel like my whole life is still ahead of me. Then reality comes and slaps you in the face...
After eight nights of stims, this morning's U/S showed just two measurable follies on my right (a 16, 14 and possibly another unmeasurable one) and a few (maybe 2 or 3) unmeasurable ones on my left that probably won't grow. I started my Ganirelix this morning right after my appointment. My next appointment will be on Friday.
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I received my bloodwork update. My E2 is 401 and my lining measured 8.0 mm, so I will press full steam ahead with the same dose of medication, but with adding one thingy of Ganirelix into the mix each AM.
After eight nights of stims, this morning's U/S showed just two measurable follies on my right (a 16, 14 and possibly another unmeasurable one) and a few (maybe 2 or 3) unmeasurable ones on my left that probably won't grow. I started my Ganirelix this morning right after my appointment. My next appointment will be on Friday.
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I received my bloodwork update. My E2 is 401 and my lining measured 8.0 mm, so I will press full steam ahead with the same dose of medication, but with adding one thingy of Ganirelix into the mix each AM.
Monday, September 21, 2009
Be the Tortoise!
I had my first ultrasound appointment this morning (stim day 7). The appointment itself went great - the staff was pleasant and I was in and out in about 15 minutes. While the waiting room was busy, I presume I was the first (and only at that time) IVF patient there (everyone else was there for something else) because Dr. Sacks told the receptionist when I checked in that he'll see me next. Within five minutes we were underway. I told Dr. Sacks that I wasn't feeling anything going on yet and he reassured me by telling me that it was still early. He saw one follicle on my right that measured 10 mm (which was probably the same one that I had when I went for my baseline) and a few other smaller ones and a few small ones on my left. He told me that he didn't want to see a dominant follicle develop and when I asked if that one on the right was dominant, he said it wasn't because it was still small. He said that depending on my bloodwork results he will see me on either Wednesday or Thursday. I asked him, "so things are ok now, right?" He responded that things were fine and told me, "be the tortoise." So now I get to wait on the bloodwork results and keep on keepin' on.
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I just got my bloodwork call from my nurse. My E2 went from 52.7 to 135 and my lining is at 6. I asked for more details on my follies and she told me that the other follies on my right are just slightly smaller. I have that 10, an 8 and another 8. I have some on my left, but they are unmeasurable at this point. I return on Wednesday and am supposed to bring my Ganirelix in case I need to add that to the mix. So I'm pleased that I have at least three that are growing together!
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